Grosey's Messages

Developing Your Spiritual

Maturity

Ephesians 4:¹¹ And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers,¹² to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ,¹³ until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,¹⁴ so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes.¹⁵ Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ,¹⁶ from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

Christian Maturity

Christian Maturity involves a number of different, yet interrelated, factors. Underline the words in Ephesians 4:11-16 that highlight Christian Maturity.

1. The Knowledge Factor:

"..until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God,"

Christian Maturity involves growing in knowledge which is both true (propositionally) and relevant (personal) as brought home to us in the knowledge of Jesus Christ. There needs to be understanding, which is knowing how Biblical facts inter-relate. There needs to be the instruction in the Word of God by the Holy Spirit; making the objective truths subjective.

2Timothy 3:16,17 teaches us

2 Peter 3:18 But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. Amen.

Memorise this verse.

2. The Integration Factor:

"to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ"

How does the Holy Spirit of God help us integrate what we know in our minds to become character forming, so we exhibit the fruit of the Spirit?

Galatians 5: 16-26

3. The Love Factor:

^"15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ,"

Without a doubt, the value of loving and being loved is crucial to our balanced development as individual personalities, let alone in our development as mature Christians. Paul often begins his epistles by commending a church on its faith, hope and love. Gene Getz, in his book "The Measure Of A Church", states that a mature church will display qualities of faith, hope and love in an abundance. What are the qualities of love that should be evident in our lives listed in 1 Corinthians 13?

How do you know that you are loved by God?

Love is expressed in relationships

4. The Group Factor.

^"16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love."

A significant finding in the realm of counselling  theory is the rediscovery of the fundamental importance of "inter-personal relationships". The groups we belong to tend to determine our attitudes,
emotional responses and our actions.

1Corinthians 15:33

Ephesians 4:7-16

Why is the small group important?             

What can close Christian friendships do?.=.....                                

Throughout the epistles, Paul and the other Biblical writers use the phrase "one another". List out (with the help of a concordance) each of the attitudes or actions we are directed to have towards one another in the Body of Christ.

5. The Self-Concept Factor : 

"¹³ until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,"

There are many factors that should be taken into account when we are determining our own concept of what we are really like. It is not Biblical to be preoccupied with our selves, nor with only one aspect of who we are, such as our sexuality. You are uniquely who God made you to be. Self is a wrong "core" or obsession for personality. Still, there are some aspects we must always bear in mind. Read these passages and list the factors we should bear in mind.

Romans 12:3       

Romans 3:10,20.

Romans 5:1,6-8.               

Ephesians 1:4,5.,              

Ephesians 2:4,5,10.       

Romans 6:13.     

What are your spiritual gifts?

What does your heart desire?

What are the abilities that you have?

What is your personality like?

Dominant

Interacting

Steadiness

Cautious Compliant

What experiences have you had?

Educational and training?

Spiritual?

Vocational?

Painful?

Profitable?

6. The Goals / Purpose Factor

"¹³ until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,"

A maturing believer will have spiritual goals.

What is our overall purpose (Eph 4:11-16)?

What are meaningful goals for you and why?

G od-given vision

O rganise
A ssess

L earn to lean

S ee Obstacles as opportunities

God intends you to become mature: How can you organise for this to happen?

Assess your strengths and weaknesses. What do you need to work on?

What are you trusting God to do in your life that only God can do?

What opportunities are before you now?

7. The Resilience Factor:

"¹⁴ so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes."

How are we protected from being tossed backward and forward?

The maturing disciple of Christ is content to be disciplined by the Lord. He does not treat such times lightly, nor does he despond. Read Hebrews 12:4-13.

Describe one time when you were under the disciplining hand of the Lord.

Make your own paraphrase of James 1: 2-4.         

What is the object of trials? 1Peter 1:4-7.

Piaget, Kohlberg, etc. Kant: Autonomy.

Erikson's stages of psychosocial development
Stage             Issue         Age

Trust vs. Mistrust    Hope       0 - 1½

Autonomy vs. Shame    Will    1½ - 3.

Initiative vs. Guilt    Purpose   3 - 5.

Industry vs. Inferiority    Competency  5 - 12.

Identity vs. Role Confusion   Fidelity   12 - 18.

Intimacy vs. Isolation     Love    18 - 40.

Generativity vs. Stagnation   Care  40 - 65.

Ego Integrity vs. Despair  Wisdom  65+

Dr. W.E. Andersen, "Persons are whole beings who develop, in their multi-faceted ways, whenever and wherever they are caught up in new relations either with aspects of themselves or the reality around them. Persons are also needy human beings whose nature is to be both active and responsive to the actions of others, and hence who were fashioned for participation in personal relationships with God and with fellow-humans. Further, they are inescapably orientated beings: that is, designed to become focussed about some centre, Though distinctive as individuals, and needing to develop a self-concept which is serviceable in all their relations, they flourish only within the solidarity of a family, or a family-like community. As they discern between persons and things, they become responsible for acting morally. that individual maturity does not have the goal of individual autonomy, but rather the ultimate goal — restoration of wholeness, the restoration of the image of God in man.

Biblical Christian Maturity  11-13 Knowledge, Purpose, Self-concept, Love, Relationship, Small group, Resilience.

FACTORS CONTRIBUTING TO CHRISTIAN MATURITY

KNOWLEDGE  Pendulum  Worldview influenced by Kant

Only what can be tested scientifically is propositionally true.  Scientism Only the science's matter, and humanity subjects are useless Modernism: only what is propositional can be known to be true.

E.Y.Mullins "Physical science has tended to narrow the idea of truth to propositions which can be proved in exact mathematical terms. But this narrowing of the conception is due to a confusion of truth itself with a particular form for expressing it. There are many ways of expressing the meaning of reality. The claim to truth cannot be based upon any one way to the exclusion of others. The test of the claim to truth is the test as to the reality with which it deals, at least this is the primary and fundamental test. Spiritual realities will not yield the same formulae for expressing their meaning as those found in the sphere of physics. But they are none the less real and may find interpretation in terms of truth."

Pluralism Everybody's worldview is true for them. Truth is personal. Personalism/Individualism

Post-Modernism No view of truth is true "what is truth?" John 18:38   Jn 14:6  Propositional truth AND Personal truth

alethia' involved an accurate perspective on reality993. Romans similarly spoke of veritas as a factual representation of events. In the Hebrew Scriptures, "truth" (emeth, emunah) primarily conveyed the notion of God's faithfulness.

2Peter 3: 18 But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Propositionally Jesus is true  Personally Jesus is truth and can be known. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.

Propositional Truth  1 Cor 15: 3 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures,4 that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures,

Personal truth John 17:3 And this is eternal life, that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent. Phil 3: 8  that I may gain Christ9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith---10 that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death,

PURPOSEFULL 13   We perceive ourselves as able to give order and direction to their lives through their ability to evaluate and make choices which are in keeping with their moral desires and orientation. Fullness as the goal to which humans are to attain. This fullness is found in self-forgetfulness in compassionate loving relationships, rather than self-actualisation through performance in a vocation. By recognising maturity as the goal that develops a sense of fullness, rather than autonomy or vocation, spirituality becomes incorporated into purposeful living. "The goal is maturity and knowledge of the Son of God,

SELF-CONCEPT, 13  "What am I referring to when I say the word "I"? … Where does my sense of self come from? … Was it made for me or did it arise spontaneously? … Am I different when I present myself in different ways to my boss, my family, my friends, social security, someone I'm in love with or a stranger in the street? Do I really know myself?" one's sense of self depends on seeing one's self reflected in interactions with others. The 'looking-glass self' refers to the notion that the self develops through our perception of others' evaluations and appraisals of us.For us as Christians it incorporates . fallenness, and our redemption in Christ. It takes into account our Sanctification, that God has a purpose for our lives to conform us to the image of Christ (Rom 8:29)  "you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all." (Col 3:9,10). Spiritual gifts, our Heart, our Abilities, our Personalities and our Experiences.

LOVE  15 Jesus' model of self-sacrificial behavior bringing fulfillment in community. The other in reciprocal relationship. outward focused and self forgetful in our love towards God and others in the community of believers.

Hence the greatest commandment is  You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.38 This is the great and first commandment.39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.40 On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets."

"Love (agape) is or vital importance in maturity. It is the Christian value that is central to the whole process of "upbuilding." "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth." self-transcendence." Sacrificial, serving, self-forgetful love. Jn13;34

RELATIONALITY  16  there is a growing crisis of depersonalization in modern westernized society where our primary mode of communication is technologically based and characterized by the depersonalization of human relations Depersonalization defines the extent to which human relationships have substituted face - to - face human interchange in preference for technologically mediated communication. forms of social disconnection and alienation, resulting in loneliness, depression, social isolation and a rise in uncivil behaviours based upon frustration, hopelessness and the devaluation of human life are becoming increasingly evident in our communities. There is an urgent need for people to find a personal sense of purpose, develop deep and sustainable personal relationships by immersing ourselves in high-contact personal environments..  Acts 2: 42 And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers.43 And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles.44 And all who believed were together and had all things in common.45 And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need.46 And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, Think of your favourite teacher at school.  A personal manner of teaching involves teaching with a measure of feeling, rather than a style that lacks any trace of warmth. A "cold " or "detached" manner, doesn't cut it anywhere. Love can make an impact, even though it cannot be taught.

SMALL GROUP  16 Humanity is relational. We are embedded in "swarms of relationships". We have biological relationships, familiar relationships, shallow relationships, deep relationships; "one cannot be a self on one's own. I am a self only in relation to certain interlocutors: in one way in relation to those conversation partners who were essential to my achieving self-definition Methodism's class groups, Sunday school classes youth groups are very necessary.

RESILIENCE   14  Victor Frankl an Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist, quoting Nietzsche, after considering the differences between those who did or didn't survive the German concentration camps of World War 2, noted that "Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'." Resilience is found in a Purpose Beyond This Life

An Assessment Guide For Maturity (wholeness, Fullness)

Knowledge  Purposeful  Self-Identity

Love   Relationality  Small Group

Resilience through Trust

In the Local Church  Do we express

A Biblical knowledge

An Atmosphere of loving service to one another

A focus on Small Group relationality

A Purposefulness (training opportunities)

Gospel associations, affirmations, articulations

Stretching opportunities (missions)

Dependence upon God

Denominationally are we Organising around Ephesians 4

Servant Leadership (modelled and taught)

Multiplying leadership and resources  TEAMS

Delegation and Supervision  Every member ministry

Assisting others with coping with pressures

Ephesians 4:1-16 Spiritual Maturity

Factors Contributing To Christian Maturity

The definition of maturity is one that has been largely determined within several worldviews prevalent in what some have declared to be out post-christian society.  Some have described "Maturity" from the findings and descriptions of modern psychological theories. Emmanuel Kant described maturity in terms of individual autonomy.  According to Kant, "immaturity is self-imposed when its cause lies not in lack of understanding, but in lack of resolve and courage to use it without guidance from another." Maturity, then, is to be free from the laziness of dependence upon moral guides and through individual rationality self-determine one's own morality.

In the field of education there has been an obsession with developmental psychology, that every child grows to maturity through several specified stages.

Kant's concept of individual autonomy is embedded in some modern psycho-social development theories. Fundamental to these theories is the premise that human persons develop from infancy to old age according to a series of identifiable stages. Developmental objectives culminate in autonomy.

Piaget 4 stages of Cognitive Development: Children should progress from being Concrete thinkers towards thinking abstractly about things.

Kohlberg.. stages of moral development.

Erikson's 8 choices folk make as they mature to make sure they don't get stalled in some part of their psycho social development.

Trust vs. Mistrust    Hope       0 - 1½

Autonomy vs. Shame    Will     1½ - 3.

Initiative vs. Guilt    Purpose     3 - 5.

Industry vs. Inferiority    Competency  5 - 12.

Identity vs. Role Confusion   Fidelity   12 - 18.

Intimacy vs. Isolation     Love       18 - 40.

Generativity vs. Stagnation     Care   40 - 65.

Ego Integrity vs. Despair      Wisdom  65+

Rather than being an issue of development, God's Word defines maturity as moral, spiritual and relational (all aspects derived from what it means to be created in the image of God, and then after the fall aspects redeveloped in the new creation that is in the image of our Creator, according to Col 3).

Dr. W.E. Andersen, former Lecturer in Education at the University of Sydney, has encouraged students to consider a different, more relational model for maturity: "Persons are whole beings who develop, in their multi-faceted ways, whenever and wherever they are caught up in new relations either with aspects of themselves or the reality around them. To contribute to this development, then, it is just not feasible to concentrate on one facet. Just as architecture has come to consider the relevance to its design of every aspect of living within a building, so those who help in the building of persons must not be surprised when a variety of factors, related to personal development, confront them… Persons are also needy human beings whose nature is to be both active and responsive to the actions of others, and hence who were fashioned for participation in personal relationships with God and with fellow-humans. Further, they are inescapably orientated beings: that is, designed to become focussed about some centre, and to develop a life-view in accord with it; and they are creatures whose consciousness is a blend of thinking, feeling and doing. Though distinctive as individuals, and needing to develop a self-concept which is serviceable in all their relations, they flourish only within the solidarity of a family, or a family-like community. As they discern between persons and things, they become responsible for acting morally. Andersen, W.E. (1983).'A Biblical View of Education' Journal of Christian Education papers 77 p. 22, 23.

He notes that individual maturity does not have the goal of individual autonomy, but rather the ultimate goal — restoration of wholeness, the restoration of the image of God in man. This concept of wholeness and restoration is a theologically and ethically laden concept, that implies a fallenness in humanity (sin), and its implications for morality within that restoration. Andersen identified several factors necessary for the development of maturity in individuals in community.

A Knowledge Factor

11 And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers,12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ,13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood,

The Pendulum extreme of Kantian scientism and modernism

Theologian E.Y.Mullins notes: "Physical science has tended to narrow the idea of truth to propositions which can be proved in exact mathematical terms. But this narrowing of the conception is due to a confusion of truth itself with a particular form for expressing it. There are many ways of expressing the meaning of reality. The claim to truth cannot be based upon any one way to the exclusion of others. The test of the claim to truth is the test as to the reality with which it deals, at least this is the primary and fundamental test. Spiritual realities will not yield the same formulae for expressing their meaning as those found in the sphere of physics. But they are none the less real and may find interpretation in terms of truth. Again, the appeal of the truths of religion is of the strongest kind. It is an intellectual appeal in the narrower sense of the word. The reason is satisfied because the truths of the Christian religion may be presented in a coherent system which has unity and self-consistency. The moral nature is satisfied because the result is the triumph of the moral nature over sin and self and the world. All the higher personal life is satisfied because in the Christian experience human personality comes to its own. Self-realization, a consciousness of having found the meaning of life and destiny, is bound up in the Christian experience."

The Pendulum of extreme of Pluralism, Personal individualism and Postmodernism, What is truth?

Propositional truth

The term "truth" had currency in Greek philosophy, Roman thought, and the Hebrew Bible including its many uses in the Old Testament Greek Septuagint (lxx).992 In Greek philosophy, one of the senses of 'alethia' involved an accurate perspective on reality993. Romans similarly spoke of veritas as a factual representation of events. In the Hebrew Scriptures, "truth" (emeth, emunah) primarily conveyed the notion of God's faithfulness. This faithfulness had been revealed throughout the history of Israel and, according to John, found supreme expression in the life, ministry, and substitutionary death of Jesus (John 1:14; 14:6). In John's Gospel, where the importance of "truth" is in the Synoptics, the notion of 'truth' is inextricably related to God, and to Jesus' relationship with God, and the possibility of personal and individual relationship with God. Hence the concept of 'truth' and knowledge conveyed more than propositionally true statements, there is also a relational aspect that spoke of faithfulness and rectitude to the nature of God himself.

We can help others to know the truth, understanding the relationship between objective knowledge disciplines and the subjective experience of truth.

Spirituality is demonstrably necessary for the development of a meaningful and purposeful existence. Noble (2001) highlighted two characteristics that are important for psycho-social development: the conscious realisation that our physical reality is part of a bigger multidimensional reality; and, the conscious striving to attain psychological health for oneself and for the greater good. The emphasis on consciousness in Noble's description underscores the cognitive dimension of the spiritual way of knowing.

Send the right Message

2Peter 3: 18 But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Personal truth

Serve the right Master

Acts 4 They could see these men had been with Jesus.

Ephesians 4:13. Similarly, Colossians 1:27 states "We proclaim Him, admonishing every man and teaching every man with all wisdom, so that we may present every man complete in Christ."

Purposefulness Factor

13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,

Human beings perceive themselves as purposeful beings who are able to give order and direction to their lives through their ability to evaluate and make choices which are in keeping with their moral desires and orientation. "We understand ourselves as creatures with purposes and goals and see our action as guided or informed by these...action is typically linked with responsibility. If I succeed at a certain goal, then I am generally held accountable for that outcome. If on the contrary I contribute to an outcome that was not my desire of purpose, my personal responsibility decreases." The person who suddenly finds themselves retrenched, unemployed or chronically ill, can find their self-concept decimated. Rather than objectifying a vocational goal, Taylor and Andersen utilise the concept of fullness as the goal to which humans are to attain. This fullness is found in self-forgetfulness in compassionate loving relationships, rather than self-actualisation through performance in a vocation.

It is this goal of fullness that Andersen establishes as a worthwhile New Testament goal: "Until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ."

By recognising maturity as the goal that develops a sense of fullness, rather than autonomy or vocation, spirituality becomes incorporated into purposeful living. "The goal is maturity and knowledge of the Son of God, but the process is one of the individual-in-community and the community acting through believers in such a way that individual and community emphases are virtually inseparable."

A Self-Concept factor

to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,

"What am I referring to when I say the word "I"? … Where does my sense of self come from? … Was it made for me or did it arise spontaneously? … Am I different when I present myself in different ways to my boss, my family, my friends, social security, someone I'm in love with or a stranger in the street? Do I really know myself?" Charles Cooley believed that one's sense of self depends on seeing one's self reflected in interactions with others. The 'looking-glass self' refers to the notion that the self develops through our perception of others' evaluations and appraisals of us. This process started in childhood - children began to develop a sense of self at about the same time that they began to learn language. The acquisition of language skills coincides with the growth of mental capacities, including the ability to think of ourselves as separate and distinct, and to see ourselves in relationship to others.

A Christian view of the self takes into account our fallenness, and our redemption in Christ. It takes into account our Sanctification, that God has a purpose for our lives to conform us to the image of Christ (Rom 8:29) and "you have put off the old self with its practices10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator.11 Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all." (Col 3:9,10).

The self concept factor includes understanding who we are before God: our Spiritual gifts, our Heart, our Abilities, our Personalities and our Experiences.

A Love factor

15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ,

The priority of love in Jesus' teaching provides a model of self-sacrificial behavior bringing fulfillment in community. "In the New Testament building up a person is inextricably bound up with a warm concern for and interest in that person. It also involves the desire for a reciprocal relationship and while it is possible for one person to love another without such reciprocation, love is such that it invites personal response. We express love in a readiness to initiate and share a personal relationship with the other person if he or she welcomes the relationship." There is a sense of communion with God and others that comes about as we are outward focused and self forgetful in our love towards God and others in the community of believers.

Hence the greatest commandment is  You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.38 This is the great and first commandment.39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.40 On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets."

"Love (agape) is or vital importance in maturity. It is the Christian value that is central to the whole process of "upbuilding." Thus "each of us should please his neighbour for his good, to build him up." "Though many factors contribute to upbuilding, love is essential." Further, love binds many fruitful actions and attitudes together harmoniously. Love, however, is not primarily a vague feeling or attitude. In the New Testament it refers collectively to loving actions: "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth." "In the New Testament building up a person is inextricably bound up with a warm concern for and interest in that person. It also involves the desire for a reciprocal relationship and while it is possible for one person to love another without such reciprocation, love is such that it invites personal response. We express love in a readiness to initiate and share a personal relationship with the other person if he or she welcomes the relationship."

Frankl comments "By declaring that man is responsible and must actualize the potential meaning of his life, I wish to stress that the true meaning of life is to be discovered in the world rather than within man or his own psyche, as though it were a closed system. I have termed this constitutive characteristic "the self-transcendence of human existence." It denotes the fact that being human always points, and is directed, to something or someone, other than oneself - be it a meaning to fulfil or another human being to encounter. The more one forgets himself - by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love - the more human he is and the more he actualizes himself. What is called self-actualization is not an attainable aim at all, for the simple reason that the more one would strive for it, the more he would miss it. In other words, self-actualization is possible only as a side-effect of self-transcendence." Sacrificial, serving, self-forgetful love is the only way to move towards self-actualisation, by becoming self-forgetful.

Frankl, V Man's search for meaning: the classic tribute to hope from the holocaust Sydney: Rider p.115

A Relational Factor

16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

There is a growing crisis of depersonalization in modern westernized society where our primary mode of communication is technologically based and characterized by the depersonalization of human relations (Laura, Marchant & Smith, 2008) Depersonalization defines the extent to which human relationships have substituted face - to - face human interchange in preference for technologically mediated communication. The implications of this social development are profound: forms of social disconnection and alienation, resulting in loneliness, depression, social isolation and a rise in uncivil behaviours based upon frustration, hopelessness and the devaluation of human life are becoming increasingly evident in our communities and schools.

There is an urgent need for people to find a personal sense of purpose, develop deep and sustainable personal relationships by immersing ourselves in high-contact personal environments..

An overemphasis upon individualised, technologized instruction may be depersonalising the socialisation process in many schools.

Depersonalised churches are churches where there is little focus on meaningful relationships outside of the church service.

Listen to how foreign that was to the New testament church.

Acts 2: 42 And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers.43 And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles.44 And all who believed were together and had all things in common.45 And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need.46 And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts,

As love cannot exist without an object, the relationality of love is an obvious necessity; whether it be to God, individuals, corporate bodies, cultural products or nature in its breadth 

But in so many cases, the ability to talk to somebody who will listen, and the sense that one's troubles are taken seriously are themselves potent therapy. And when such confidence is inspired, there are few problems about the social cohesion of the group."

Think of your favourite teacher at school.  A personal manner of teaching involves teaching with a measure of feeling, rather than a style that lacks any trace of warmth. A "cold " or "detached" manner, doesn't cut it anywhere. Love can make an impact, even though it cannot be taught. Peace is not the same as the absence of discord or strife. Both in the Old Testament (shalom) and the New Testament (eirene) peace means living fully within all the basic relationships of God's creation and doing so with joy. Nicholas Wolterstorff (19831051) gives a beautiful summary of peace:

• Shalom in the first place incorporates right, harmonious relationships to God and delight in his service.

• Secondly, shalom incorporates right, harmonious relationships to other human beings and delight in human community.

• Thirdly, shalom incorporates right, harmonious relationships to nature and delight in our physical surroundings.

In summary, "the right relationships that lie at a basis of Shalom involve more than right relationships to other human beings. They involve right relationships to God, to nature, and to oneself as well."

A Small Group Factor

16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

Humanity is relational. We are embedded in "swarms of relationships". We have biological relationships, familiar relationships, shallow relationships, deep relationships; "one cannot be a self on one's own. I am a self only in relation to certain interlocutors: in one way in relation to those conversation partners who were essential to my achieving self-definition; in another in relation to those who are now crucial to my continuing grasp of languages of self-understanding – and of course these classes may overlap. A self exists only within what I call 'webs of interlocution'.

Human beings utilise Language. Language is our means to relationships with others1060.

Economic necessity in Western democracies has tended to minimise the amount of time individuals have to enjoy group life. Technological options such as television, video gaming, and other communications media have reduced face-to-face interaction in family and community networks. Group life, where people meet regularly for interactional sharing and review of ideas, has largely disappeared, even from churches, where group life was once the distinctive feature of early Methodism.

A Resilience Factor

14 so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes.

Resilience is found in Purpose In This Life

Victor Frankl an Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist, quoting Nietzsche, after considering the differences between those who did or didn't survive the German concentration camps of World War 2, noted that "Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'." "The one thing you can't take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to me. The last of one's freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given circumstance." "In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of a sacrifice." This is the paradox of suffering. Suffering produces resilience when there is a meaning behind the suffering. Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.

"Spirituality turned out to be the most important significant predictor of depression. (2017)" "Most of these adolescents reported some connection with religious and spiritual concepts, and those with higher levels of spiritual well-being, in particular, existential well-being, had fewer depressive symptoms and fewer risk-taking behaviors. This supports the inclusion of these concepts in our efforts to help promote resilience and healthy adolescent development. (Cotton et al., 2005)." "Religious coping was significantly predictive of spiritual outcome, and changes in mental and physical health. Generally, positive methods of religious coping (e.g. seeking spiritual support, benevolent religious reappraisals) were associated with improvements in health."

Resilience is found in a Purpose Beyond This Life

Taylor acknowledges the necessity of something beyond this life after death, as securing purposefulness and meaning inspite of death.

"What I mean by this is something more like: the point of things isn't exhausted by life, the fullness of life, even the goodness of life. This is not meant to be a repudiation of egoism, the idea that the fullness of my life (and perhaps those of people I love) should be my only concern. Let us agree with John Stuart Mill that a full life must involve striving for the benefit of all humankind. Then acknowledging the transcendent means seeing a point beyond that. One form ofthis is the insight that we can find in suffering and death - not merely negation, the undoing of fullness and life, but also a place to affirm something that matters beyond life, on which life itself originally draws...What matters beyond life doesn't matter just because it sustains life; otherwise it wouldn't be 'beyond life' in the meaning of the act.

An Assessment Guide For Maturity (wholeness, Fullness)

•Knowledge

•Love

•Relationality

•Purposefulness

•Self-Identity

•Resilience

•Spirituality

Church Modelling

•Biblical knowledge

•Atmosphere of loving service to one another

•Small Group relationality

•Purposefulness (training towards these things)

•Gospel associations, affirmations, articulations

•Stretching opportunities (missions)

•Dependence upon God

Organising our denomination around Ephesians 4

•Servant Leadership (modelled and taught)

•Multiplying leadership and resources

•TEAMS

•Delegation and Supervision

•Every member ministry

•Coping with pressures

ECCLESIASTES 8: 1-9:6 

¹ Who is like the wise? And who knows the interpretation of a thing? A man's wisdom makes his face shine, and the hardness of his face is changed.

² I say: Keep the king's command, because of God's oath to him.³ Be not hasty to go from his presence. Do not take your stand in an evil cause, for he does whatever he pleases.⁴ For the word of the king is supreme, and who may say to him, "What are you doing?"⁵ Whoever keeps a command will know no evil thing, and the wise heart will know the proper time and the just way.⁶ For there is a time and a way for everything, although man's trouble lies heavy on him.⁷ For he does not know what is to be, for who can tell him how it will be?⁸ No man has power to retain the spirit, or power over the day of death. There is no discharge from war, nor will wickedness deliver those who are given to it.⁹ All this I observed while applying my heart to all that is done under the sun, when man had power over man to his hurt.

¹⁰ Then I saw the wicked buried. They used to go in and out of the holy place and were praised in the city where they had done such things. This also is vanity.¹¹ Because the sentence against an evil deed is not executed speedily, the heart of the children of man is fully set to do evil.¹² Though a sinner does evil a hundred times and prolongs his life, yet I know that it will be well with those who fear God, because they fear before him.¹³ But it will not be well with the wicked, neither will he prolong his days like a shadow, because he does not fear before God.

¹⁴ There is a vanity that takes place on earth, that there are righteous people to whom it happens according to the deeds of the wicked, and there are wicked people to whom it happens according to the deeds of the righteous. I said that this also is vanity.¹⁵ And I commend joy, for man has no good thing under the sun but to eat and drink and be joyful, for this will go with him in his toil through the days of his life that God has given him under the sun.

¹⁶ When I applied my heart to know wisdom, and to see the business that is done on earth, how neither day nor night do one's eyes see sleep,¹⁷ then I saw all the work of God, that man cannot find out the work that is done under the sun. However much man may toil in seeking, he will not find it out. Even though a wise man claims to know, he cannot find it out.

9:1 But all this I laid to heart, examining it all, how the righteous and the wise and their deeds are in the hand of God. Whether it is love or hate, man does not know; both are before him.² It is the same for all, since the same event happens to the righteous and the wicked, to the good and the evil, to the clean and the unclean, to him who sacrifices and him who does not sacrifice. As the good one is, so is the sinner, and he who swears is as he who shuns an oath.³ This is an evil in all that is done under the sun, that the same event happens to all. Also, the hearts of the children of man are full of evil, and madness is in their hearts while they live, and after that they go to the dead.⁴ But he who is joined with all the living has hope, for a living dog is better than a dead lion.⁵ For the living know that they will die, but the dead know nothing, and they have no more reward, for the memory of them is forgotten.⁶ Their love and their hate and their envy have already perished, and forever they have no more share in all that is done under the sun.

We have visited Solomon's Playlist of Songs.  We have avoided country music. There is the truth about Country music , it is mostly about suffering. Two major themes are suffering because of a mean or ugly woman, and the suffering that comes from drinking. Here are some song titles demonstrating those themes. "Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure;" and "I Wouldn't Take Her to a Dawg Fight, 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win."  "I'd Rather Have a Bottle in Front of Me Than a Frontal Lobotomy;"  January 1, 1953 the #1 song on the country music charts was written and sung by Hank Williams. It was "I'll Never Get Out of This World Alive" and the words said: "Now you're lookin' at a man that's gettin' kind-a mad / I had lot's of luck but it's all been bad / No matter how I struggle and strive / I'll never get out of this world a- live."  It's ironic that on the very day that this song became #1, Hank Williams died, January 1, 1953,  engraved on his headstone "I'll never get out of this world alive."

I heard a funny story about a preacher who was attempting to impress upon the congregation the reality of death. He said, "Every member of this church is going to die!" When he said that a young boy on the front row giggled. So the preacher thundered again, "I say, every member of this church is going to die!" The same kid on the front row laughed again. The preacher stopped and said, "Son, what's so funny about what I said?" The boy said, "I'm not a member of this church!"

Hebrews 9:27-28: "Just as man is destined to die once, and after that to face judgment, so Christ was sacrificed once to take away the sins of many people; and he will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for him." Is it really true "you'll never get out of this world alive?" Let's notice three important truths found in this portion of God's Word.

1.     RECKON ON THE CERTAINTY OF DEATH

For there is a time and a way for everything, although man's trouble lies heavy on him.⁷ For he does not know what is to be, for who can tell him how it will be?⁸ No man has power to retain the spirit, or power over the day of death. There is no discharge from war, nor will wickedness deliver those who are given to it.⁹ All this I observed while applying my heart to all that is done under the sun, when man had power over man to his hurt. ¹⁰ Then I saw the wicked buried. They used to go in and out of the holy place and were praised in the city where they had done such things. This also is vanity.

9:1 But all this I laid to heart, examining it all, how the righteous and the wise and their deeds are in the hand of God. Whether it is love or hate, man does not know; both are before him.2 It is the same for all, since the same event happens to the righteous and the wicked, to the good and the evil, to the clean and the unclean, to him who sacrifices and him who does not sacrifice. As the good one is, so is the sinner, and he who swears is as he who shuns an oath.3 This is an evil in all that is done under the sun, that the same event happens to all. Also, the hearts of the children of man are full of evil, and madness is in their hearts while they live, and after that they go to the dead.4 But he who is joined with all the living has hope, for a living dog is better than a dead lion.5 For the living know that they will die, but the dead know nothing, and they have no more reward, for the memory of them is forgotten.6 Their love and their hate and their envy have already perished, and forever they have no more share in all that is done under the sun.

Don't Deny It

Our age has many names for death so we don't have to say it: "to turn your toes up" "to croak" ""he's gone" "he passed away" "he is no longer with us." In his poem "Graveyards," Sir John Betjeman, the late poet laureate of England, wrote: Oh, why do people waste their breath  Inventing dainty names for death

A few years ago, a letter went out from the Department of Social Services. The letter was addressed to over fifty former residents who had recently died. The letter said: "To whom it may concern: Your payments will be stopped effective immediately, because we have received notice that you passed away. You may reapply if your circumstances change."

J. C. Ryle wrote: Death is the mighty leveler. He spares no one. He will not tarry till you are ready. He will not be kept out by moats, and doors, and bars, and bolts. The Englishman boasts that his home is his castle, but with all his boasting, he cannot exclude death. An Austrian nobleman forbade death and the smallpox to be named in his presence. But, named or not named, it matters little, in God's appointed hour death will come.

There are health-conscious people who work out daily, eat a disciplined diet, take their vitamins, and then suffer a heart attack while jogging, like a neighbor of ours a few years ago. Sadly the 50 year old super-fit guy went running without his license or phone, and as he lived alone no one knew who he was for about a week. We can and should care for our bodies, but there's nothing we can do to be in total control.

During her lifetime, Queen Elizabeth I was considered the most powerful woman on earth. But as she was dying, she said, "Oh my God! It is over. I have come to the end of it—the end, the end. To have only one life, and to have done with it! To have lived, and loved, and triumphed; and now to know it is over! One may defy everything else but this."

You may agree with Woody Allen who said, "It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens."

The death of 52 year old Shane Warne in March this year at such a young age warns us so much of this reality. The National health authority recognised today that for those who caught Covid this year are 20 times more likely to die of a heart attack or stroke than those who did not catch it according to some studies in the UK and USA of 48 million people.  "What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." (James 4:14).

2.     REALISE THE REALITY OF JUDGEMENT

¹⁰ Then I saw the wicked buried. They used to go in and out of the holy place and were praised in the city where they had done such things. This also is vanity.¹¹ Because the sentence against an evil deed is not executed speedily, the heart of the children of man is fully set to do evil.¹² Though a sinner does evil a hundred times and prolongs his life, yet I know that it will be well with those who fear God, because they fear before him.¹³ BUT IT WILL NOT BE WELL WITH THE WICKED, neither will he prolong his days like a shadow, because he does not fear before God.

"It is appointed for men to die once ... and after that to face judgement." (Hebrews 9:27) Death is not the end, the Bible teaches that there is something after death - judgement. You won't miss your appointment with death, and you will have you day in God's court. Whether you are a Christian, or an unbeliever, you will face God's judgement after you die. It will be a judgement that results in people being thrown into the lake of fire, which is the second death. The Apostle John described the final judgment in these words: "Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. Earth and sky fled from his presence...and I saw the dead, great and small standing before the throne...the dead were judged according to what they had done...If anyone's name was not found written in the book of Life, he was thrown into the lake of fire...the lake of fire is the second death." (Revelation 20:11-15)  When Michelangelo was painting the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican, he chose to place the last judgment on the front wall. In it, Jesus can be seen with His hand raised as if He is issuing orders. In the bottom of the picture, he painted people who were crying out in anguish from being sentenced to eternity separated from God. Who will be at this judgement? Of course, we would expect the Nero's, the Hitlers, the Stalins, and murderers who lived such evil lives. But Jesus indicated there will be counterfeit Christians there as well. Some good church members who never came to know Jesus will be there and they will be in shock. Jesus described the sad scene in Matthew 7:21. He said, "Not everyone who says unto me, 'Lord, Lord' will enter the kingdom of heaven...Many will say unto me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons, and perform many miracles?' Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never KNEW you. Away from me, you evildoers!'"

I must speak about hell because the Bible speaks about hell. It breaks my heart to think that there will be people who die without accepting God's free gift of eternal life.

I used to think it was easy to go to hell. In fact, in college I used to hand out tracts that I thought were funny. On the outside it said "How to go to hell." On the inside there were no words—it was blank by design. Meaning, if you want to go to hell you do nothing. It's easy to go to hell, just never turn to Christ and repent of your sins.

In Greek mythology, the edge of the world was the strait of Gibraltar at the western edge of the Mediterranean Sea. According to the Greeks, there was a huge statue of Hercules blocking the exit out to the Atlantic Ocean. It was called the Pillars of Hercules and it had three Latin words on it: Non Plus Ultra. Which means, "No more beyond." For centuries, the sea captains believed that was the edge of the world, so they never ventured far past that point. But we know they were wrong. And explorers like Christopher Columbus went beyond the point of where they believed there was "no more beyond." In the city of Valladolid, Spain, where Columbus is buried, there's a huge monument built to his memory. Below Columbus, we can read those three words again, non plus ultra or "no more beyond." But when you look closer you see that there is a lion in the monument who is tearing away the "non." Columbus had the courage of a lion to venture beyond the point where most people thought there was "no more  beyond." He discovered that there IS more beyond. There are some people who think there is nothing beyond the grave. They think there is non plus ultra—no more beyond.

But there was a man named Jesus who was crucified and buried. After three days He emerged from the grave and ripped away the idea that there is no more beyond. Jesus is the Lamb of God who takes away your sin. But the Bible also calls Him the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. And like the lion in that monument, Jesus tears away the doubt and fear you might have about death and the afterlife. He came out of that tomb to declare to the world that there is PLUS ULTRA! There is MORE BEYOND the grave!! And for those of us who know Jesus as our Savior that MORE BEYOND means spending eternity with Him in Heaven.

(Matthew 7:21-23) So, there is the certainty of death and the reality of Judgement and

3.     REACH OUT FOR THE POSSIBILITY OF SALVATION

I love Hebrews 9:26-28 But as it is, he has appeared once for all at the end of the ages to put away sin by the sacrifice of himself.27 And just as it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment,28 so Christ, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for him.

We hear a lot about "the second coming of Christ" and I'm excited about it. There are hundreds of verses that teach the second coming, but this is the only verse in the Bible that employs the phrase "appear a second time." Jesus came the first time to bear our sin–and He did that when He died on the cross.  1Peter 2:24 says, "He himself bore our sins in His body on the tree." When He comes the second time, He won't be coming as the gentle Jesus, meek and mild; He will return as the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. He came the first time as the Lamb of God to take away the sins of the world; He will return as the Lion of the Tribe of Judah! When He came the first time, He was judged, tortured and killed by evil men; when He comes again, He will come as the Judge! When He came the first time He tasted death; when He comes the second time He will have the keys to death and Hades. Do you know what happens to a Christian when they die? The body quits, but the true person, the soul and the spirit, go to be with Jesus. That's why the Bible says, "to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord."

Hank Williams said, "I'll never get out of this world alive." Too bad, because the truth is that if you have Jesus living in your heart, you WILL get out of this world alive.  The full meaning of the gospel is not that Jesus died–that's just one part. The gospel says He was crucified, buried, and three days later He was raised from the dead. He tasted death for me, and He conquered it. In John 11:25 Jesus made this amazing claim: "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies." (John 11:25)

He said, "Everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?" "Yes, Lord," she told him, "I believe you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who comes into the world." (John 11:26-27)

J.I. Packer is a great Christian theologian. He's 93 years old and recently wrote this about his anticipation of Heaven: "As I get older, I find that I appreciate God and people and good and lovely things more and more intensely; so it is pure delight to think that this enjoyment will continue and increase in some form, literally forever. In fact, Christians inherit the destiny which fairy tales envisaged in fancy: we live and live happily, and by God's endless mercy will live happily ever after." (Your Father Loves You, p. 68)

4. REJOICE IN THE GOOD THINGS IN LIFE

So how then shall we live in the light of our soon demise? Solomon does not say, "Eat, drink, and be merry for we're going to die." But he does give some advice for life.

1. Eat Every Meal As If It Is A Banquet.  Go, eat your bread with joy,  And drink your wine with a merry heart;  For God has already accepted your works.  ECCLESIASTES 9:7  We're surprised to see how many verses in the Bible tell us to simply enjoy our meals. In the Jewish culture, the meal was a very important time. In Solomon's day, the evening meal occurred after a grueling day of work. It was a time of joy.

2. Celebrate Every Day As If Is A Party.  Let your garments always be white,  And let your head lack no oil. ECCLESIASTES 9:8  Births, weddings, and harvest festivals were special occasions in Solomon's day. He tells us to dress every day as if we're on the way to a celebration of life. Paul joins the chorus: "Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!" (Philippians 4:4). And "rejoice always" (1 Thessalonians 5:16). Some would say, "What do I have to rejoice about? I could die anytime." Exactly! That's a great reason to let every waking moment be a celebration of God's gift of life. Get dressed. Eat out with a friend. Why? Because you can! And because God enjoys your enjoyment.

3. Enjoy Marriage As If on Your Honeymoon.  Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the sun, all your days of vanity; for that is your portion in life, and in the labor which you perform under the sun. ECCLESIASTES 9:9  Solomon had man many honeymoons—to the debasement of his kingdom. He treated himself to hundreds of wives and concubines. Now, at the end of his life, he wishes he had lavished all his love on the wife of his youth. A man who had hundreds of wives now speaks in the singular rather than the plural. One partner, one heart. Your husband or wife should be looked upon as a treasure from heaven, prepared for your joy, to serve and to be served. There are moments of irritation and seasons of discontent, but remember those are days and seasons we have but once. Why not let each day be as joyful as your honeymoon? Marital fulfillment is a choice, so choose to live and love joyfully.

4. Work As If It Were Your Final Workday. Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work or device or knowledge or wisdom in the grave where you are going. —ECCLESIASTES 9:10